52. Have a glass of wine with dinner.
If I'm going to be completely honest, I would not have even considered this project, were it not for these two rules condoning the consumption of certain strong beverages. Specifically, the coffee. Limit myself to things caffeinated by nature? No problem! I don't care for Coke, and Red Bull terrifies me. But Don't. Mess. With. My. Coffee. I'll give up meat, I'll give up white flour, I'll give up delicious Morningstar Buffalo Wings. But go without coffee? I did that for the first 18 years of my life, and I don't care to do it again, thankyouverymuch.
And while I've never been a huge drinker, I've been taking full advantage of Pollan's encouragement to open the vino. A glass of wine with dinner? Don't mind if I do! Normally, I'd refuse (extra calories - you know) but if my buddy MP says so...
I've also, by extension, included beer in this line of logic. No, Pollan doesn't specifically mention beer, and it doesn't really have any of the nutritive properties of red wine, but clearly alcohol is not verboten and if I'm drinking LOCAL beer... well, it's practically my duty.
The only thing is, I fear my zealous embrace of the thumbs-up to wine and coffee isn't working for me.
Oh. It pains me to even type those words.
Okay, I know that the book is the Food Rules and not the Food Bible and that there are bound to be some things that don't work for everyone, and part of this journey is discovering what works for me. But, man, it was SO much easier to say that not eating meat wasn't working for me.
But I've been feeling extremely emotionally volitile lately. Except, "emotionally volitile" makes it sound so simple and sterile. Here's the messy truth: less than a year ago, I moved over a thousand miles away from the place I'd called home for the past ten years. I violently shifted career paths; I started working three different jobs totaling a fifty-hour work-week if I'm lucky. I'm exhausted, driven, exhilerated, terrified, focused, overwhelmed, lonely, confused, and determined, sometimes all in the same day. Sometimes all in the same hour.
And I don't think all the coffee and wine is helping.
Cutting down on the coffee is kind of a no-brainer. There have already beens studies that have conclusively linked the consumption of caffeine to increased anxiety. Wine and alcohol took me a little longer to figure out. I mean, alcohol isn't a stimulant; it doesn't wind you up, it chills you out - and isn't that exactly what I need, to chill out?
It's counter-intuitive to think about sitting back at the end of a rough shift with a glass of wine, or kicking back with a beer on the back porch on a Sunday and tell myself that, despite seeming like the best idea ever, this will actually stress you out more.
But the fact is, alcohol and caffeine, no matter how benign they may seem, are still drugs. And drugs affect your mood. That's what they do. That's what they're made to do. So maybe, just maybe, when I'm not feeling in control of my emotions, I should cut out things that take that control away from me? It's just a wacky idea.
So, sorry, MP. As much as it pains me to say it. I think I've found a couple more of your rules that just don't work for me.
And in the meantime, a glass of sparkling mineral water mixed with muddled mint straight from my backyard is just as enjoyable on the back porch, and totally Food Rules-approved.
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