Hunger Journal

As promised, below is my hunger scale journal of a little under 36 hours of observation.  Needless to say, it didn't really... work.  That is, I didn't really succeed in using the scale to cultivate healthful eating habits.  BUT I learned a lot as I monitored my hunger during these two days (as I re-read this, all I can think is gosh, look how much time I spent either hungry or thinking about how hungry I'm going to be - is that normal??)  Much of these realizations I plan to share in later posts.  But in the meantime, here is the journal, in its entirety and (mostly) unedited:

DAY ONE

3:15 pm - 6 (perfectly comfortable) sliding fairly quickly into 5 (comfortable).

I feel pretty good!  Nice way to start off my experiment.  Started getting peckish again immediately after lunch, but I ate a peach about a half hour ago and that seems to have done the trick, at least for now.  I can feel myself getting hungry fairly quickly though... talking about that peach made my stomach rumble a little.  Mmm.  Yup.  Just in the process of typing this, I'm a solid 5.

4:15 – Still sitting surprisingly well between 5 and 6.  

Wow, I definitely expected to feel hungry by now, but I'm still perfectly fine.  I can sense  the hunger creeping on, though, and it's making me nervous.  I wish I could snack on something, just to be on the safe side.  There are pickles in the walk-in that I could eat…  Will not, though, as an experiment, since the idea is to not eat anything when I'm feeling perfectly comfortable.

5:15 - WHOA.  Started biking home and dropped all the way down to a 3 (uncomfortable).  

I am HUNGRY.  When did that happen???

6:15 – 2 (Oh my god oh my god oh my god.)    

I'm still not home yet, and I'm so hungry.  I'm having trouble biking, I'm so hungry.  The wind feels like it's going to blow me over, I actually feel weak.

Now I'm worried.  I'm ready to EAT THE WORLD right now.  This is the point where I become a bottomless pit. 

If I had eaten those cucumbers even though I wasn't hungry, maybe I wouldn't be going batshit insane right now.  

Okay, game plan:  Go home, have a quick salad and a handful of almonds IMMEDIATELY in an attempt to sate me till I finish making dinner and stave off bad choices.  

7:15 – 4… I think?

Game plan did NOT work.  Immediately shoved a handful of almonds into my mouth and then got to work making the salad.  Accidentally ate, like, a pound of cheese.  I don't even know how that happened.  Opened the fridge to get the stuff dinner all the sudden the cheese was in my mouth.  And I didn't even care.  

Ate a big spinach salad and a decent-sized slice of pizza (homemade), which I decided was an appropriate-sized meal.  But despite having eaten cheese, almonds, salad and a big slice of pizza, was still hungry, holding steady at a 3, 3.5.  I tried to hold out for a full 20 minutes, as I've been told that's how long it takes for the stomach to process fullness... but I was just. too. damn. hungry.  UUUUUUUGGGGGHHHH.  Ate another (smaller) piece of pizza.  

It's been over 20 minutes now, and I'm still hungry.  Could definitely eat some more, but can refrain.  I guess that puts me at a 5?  No - no, I'm not comfortable, I'm still HUNGRY.  I'm a 4!  Wait, no, AM I a 4?  W

But when I think about how much I ate, I feel a little queasy, like I ate too much.... maybe I'm a 6, working up to a 7?  No, that CAN'T be right.  I can’t be a 4 and a 6 at the same time.  I don't know! 

How is it that I can’t TELL how hungry I am!?!?

8:15 – Ugh.  Officially FULL (7).  

Right at the number that I wasn't supposed to be at.  I'm not SUPER-full - not terribly uncomfortable, but definitely full.  And starting to think about how much cheese I ate.  Oh god, why did I eat that much cheese?  What is wrong with me??

9:15 – 4.  DUDE WHAT THE HELL?  

I'm hungry again.  “Slightly uncomfortable and starting to think about food again,” that's me.  Well, whatever tummy.  It almost time for bed.  That's all you get. 

DAY 2

5:45am – A low 3.

Heading to yoga on my bike, and I don't want to bite anybody's head off yet, but am about as hungry as I can be before reaching that point.  Not going to eat a thing, though, as during hot yoga you can feel every little thing in your stomach.

6:45 – N/A

In hot yoga.  Want to throw up, and never look at food again. 

7:45 – 2 and dropping.

If I had a fork, I would take out my breakfast and start eating them right now.  But I don't, so I have to wait. 

8:45 - Hunger level somehow moved back from a ravenous 2 to a manageable 3. 

AND it's finally breakfast time, so all is well!

9:45 – A meager 4.

So much for breakfast.  Still hungry, still thinking about food.  It’s only going to get worse from here and it's not even 10:00am.  And I have nothing to snack on.  It's going to be a long, hard trek through the morning.  I'll probably have to open a bottle of Perrier in an hour or so and hope the bubbles trick my stomach into thinking it's full long enough to get to lunch.

10:45 – Almost a 5.

Went for the Perrier and the bubbles trick is totally working.

11:45 – Back down to a low 4.

The bubbles never help for long.  Grabbed a handful of carrots meant for lunch about 45 minutes ago, but it didn’t help.  Lunch is a 1pm.  Think I can last without going crazy with hunger.

12:45 – Still sinking – now a low 3. 

REALLY hungry, thank God it’s lunch.

1:45 – 5 (finally.)

I could definitely eat more, but I've packed nothing more to eat and I'm okay with that.  I'm already getting hungry again, though, unbelievably. 

2:45 - A solid 4.

Which is not the worst at all.

3:45 – 3 and falling fast.

OMG OMG.  Was planning on getting a muffin and fruit salad at the coffee shop for dinner, but I need that muffin NOW.  Okay, muffin now, maybe a sandwich for dinner.  That seems like an extravagant snack, but at this point, I don’t effing care.

4:45 – 5.  Woo!

I seriously inhaled that muffin.  But I feel sooooooo much better.  And it’s practically dinner time – maybe I shouldn’t get a sandwich after all?

5:45 – Still 5 (!?!?)

Okay, sure!  Still feeling good, so I left the coffee shop for rehearsal this evening sandwichless.  I feel comfortable, but nervous about my choice.

6:45 – 4. Yeah. Bad choice.

Everyone around me is cracking open sack-dinners.  They look so good.  Rehearsal is until 10pm.  This is going to suck.

7:45 – 3.

God I’m dumb.

8:45 – 2.

Dammit.  When I get home I’m going to eat too late and too much.